- Changing your last name after marriage is still the socially acceptable thing to do, and people will automatically start addressing you as Mrs. Green regardless of whether you have decided to legally change your name or not.
- If you plan on having or do have children it is easier to share a last name as parents then to continuously explain to teachers, doctors, playmates, and other parents that you are indeed married and the mother and father of your child.
- His name may be easier to pronounce than yours, or it just sounds nicer with your first name.
- Some women feel that changing their last name joins them to their husband and makes them a family.
- Booking travel plans, making dinner reservations, and monogramming will be much less complicated if you share a last name with your husband.
© BlueBird LLC
Thanks that was great information!
this is very nice. i am changing my name tomorrow.
Thanks, this information really helped my wife and I get started on the difficult task of changing her name
Things that used to be socially acceptable:
1) Beating your wife
2) Drunk driving
3) Slavery
4) Laws against interracial marriage
What a great reason to do something!
Things that used to be socially acceptable:
1) Beating your wife
2) Drunk driving
3) Slavery
4) Laws against interracial marriage
What a great reason to do something!
Double post more please, it does wonders for your argument.
I don’t have a problem with a woman changing her name when marrying (I will be starting the process myself as soon as my copy of the marriage license arrives) but I do resent the implication that changing a name is the *only* socially acceptable thing to do.
Also — anyone who would change their name solely for a monogram is shallow and materialistic. There are a myriad of emotions, feelings and historical implications to consider in making the decision to change one’s name (or not)… being able to own ‘a pretty monogrammed champagne glass’ is a ridiculous and immature reason to do so. (Besides, one can always monogram things with two initials.)
Socially acceptable should never really be the reason you do anything. Traditions are better reason if you don;t know of any other reason. Traditions usually have a historical meaning. As in “the two shall become one” and in history family ownership was passed down through the sons not the daughters, so it was the sons who carried the namesake and tracing lineage following the family name.
Though some women truly love their husbands-to-be and find it to be an honor to take on their name. And having children it becomes our family name and we are all proud of it.
Here is a question for you though, now I am a widow with 3 young children and I am looking at remarrying. I want to keep the name of my children and I also feel I should take on my new husband-to-be;s name. Any ideas?
I really can’t figure out what makes booking dinner or a flight more difficult with two separate names. Fine if a woman wants to change her name go ahead but to use arguments about these type of perceived difficulties to back up her choice doesn’t really add up for me. How hard is it for the person booking the dinner to give their name and what makes it more difficult suddenly to have 2 separate names when unmarried couples seem able to travel worldwide with no problems.
Well, if all these facts are true on why you should change your name to your husband’s…then it should be the same on why he should change HIS to YOURS!
@Liz
*just kidding*
And many men do… they even reference that option in their instructions (chip on your feminist shoulder
I initially kept my legal maiden name but socially went by my married name (because as the original poster mentioned, people call you by default your Mrs.married-name anyways and it takes extra effort to correct them all the time). I can vouch for the difficulties of keeping my legal maiden name. Some places wouldn’t allow me to open accounts / records with anything that wasn’t on my ID cards, hence I used my legal name. Other places would us my social, married name – especially if I was with my husband, it made it easier. The first time I created the accounts / records was easy… remembering which name I used for each account every time after that was the challenge. I even had certain accounts suspended because the name I gave didn’t match with what I opened it with. I’m not saying this as a pro or con, but rather, if you’re going to keep your maiden name, do it in all settings, whether social or legal, otherwise things could get messy.
I think couples have a lot more options today. In fact, more men are choosing their wife’s last name. Some choose to hyphenate. The thing is, a person shouldn’t be bound by tradition or others’ expectations when making this important decision. Here’s my post on the topic:
http://www.namelymarly.com/blog/2009/12/names-and-marriage/.
I took my first personal loans when I was not very old and that aided my business very much. Nevertheless, I need the commercial loan also.
As a woman who has kept her last name, I find your list of “reasons” to be ignorant and rather offensive. I think that it boils down to an issue of respect. I respect the fact that you want to change your last name and you respect the fact that I have had my name for 30 years and changing it will not make me any LESS married to my husband. I lucked out – my husband told me that he would not want to change his last name, so why should he expect me to do the same? Respect…bottom line. I do not answer to Mrs. Chambers because that is not who I am.