Newlywed Needs

Looking for name change advice or some tips for newlywed life? The MissNowMrs experts have created state-specific name change articles and checklists for you. We’ve chronicled our recommendations for how to travel while changing your name AND how to handle voting during the transition.

We’ve also compiled our best guidance for how to handle difficult sister in laws, holidays as newlyweds, the ever-annoying baby questions, and much more. Why? Because, while we are name change experts, we’re also newlywed wives, moms, and sisters.

We hope our name change advice articles help smooth your transition to your new name, and a whole new phase of life. Congratulations and best wishes from the entire MissNowMrs team!

Recipes to Help You Make a Great Impression (& Pie) this Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving is almost upon us and that means getting together with family and celebrating all of the things you are thankful for with a ton of food. It’s also a great time to showcase your personality and abilities to the family you married into. Whether it’s pumpkin, chocolate meringue, apple or berry; a fabulous slice of pie is the best way to top off a great meal. As the newlywed addition to your spouse’s family, what better thing to bring to the meal, but a homemade pie?
Here a few recipes to help you make a great impression (and pie) this Thanksgiving:

For the Traditionalist: If you and Martha Steward are BFFs make a classic dessert to add to the feast. Here are a few great recipes for pumpkin pie, apple pie and berry cobbler. Your new family is certainly in for a treat!

For the Foodie: Are you the gracious gourmet? Flaunt your skills and great taste with a Pear Tarte Tatin or, if the oven is in over-drive, why not make a festive frozen treat? You’ll have more than a few family fans after making a Pumpkin Ice Cream Pie for dessert.

For the Frazzled: Want to bring something to add to dinner, but are short on time? Here are two great ideas that take an hour or less: whip up a Blackberry Pear Pie or try this Pecan Caramel Tart Recipe. These recipes may be short on prep time but they sure aren’t lacking in flavor or presentation. No one needs to know that you made them in a matter of minutes!

For the Innovator: Are you the edgy interesting person that loves a new flavor combination? Show off your taste for adventure with Pear Soup with Pancetta & Blue Cheese. I know it’s not pie…but it’s too amazing not to mention! You could also make a Banana Rum Cream Pie that will have your in-laws drooling!

For the Health Conscious: Challenged by the invitation to bring something “sweet but healthy” to dinner? Instantly ingratiate yourself with any children in the family by bringing Caramel Apples or Cranberry Pineapple Minis!
Do you have a signature pie recipe that you plan to make this Thanksgiving? Please share it with us!

Thanksgiving As Newlyweds: Tips For Success

Ready for your first Thanksgiving as newlyweds? Millions of men and women before you have successfully hosted Thanksgiving, so why should you and your spouse be any different? The Thanksgiving meal is feared nearly as much as it is enjoyed each year.

After all, the many side dishes that come together with the giant bird require a lot of organization and planning if they are to be prepared and served correctly. That certainly doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t give it a try with hubby, but it does mean that you will want to create a game plan before you begin.

Deciding Who to Invite – One of the most difficult moments in every new marriage comes with deciding what should happen at the holidays. Whose family should be visited and when? How will the time be divided and who will be dined with? Having a dinner in your own home can help to avoid some of those uncomfortable moments, but you will still need to formulate a guest list that will likely be based on the amount of space you have for entertaining, the existing plans of loved ones, and the distance between you and them.

Work together to draw up the best possible list as far in advance as you can, so you can give friends and family members ample time to re-arrange schedules. Have a fussy family or a few “difficult family members”? Consider a seating chart…so draw upon who sat by whom at your wedding and got along and arrange your table accordingly.

Planning a Menu – The great part about Thanksgiving is that most of the meal is dependent on tradition. Unfortunately, while is the common denominator, many families will vary substantially in the rest of their menus. But, with some work, you can make a meal that pulls a little something special from each family’s traditions and makes everyone feel comfortable, welcome, and ultimately, full. Also, think about asking each family invited to bring a favorite side or dessert. This potluck concept lowers your workload and allows family members to feel included in the meal.

Shopping and Cooking – There is good reason that the Thanksgiving meal is consumed only once per year. It often requires a huge number of ingredients, a lot of space for preparation, and a great deal of time to make it happen. Fortunately, there are two of you and that means that tasks can be divided among you to make the whole event much more manageable. Enjoy the shopping time together, getting excited about the impending meal and work together to divvy up the cooking.

When it comes time to create, turn on some music that you both enjoy. Sing along, laugh together, and enjoy the special memories that are being made on your very first Thanksgiving. While one boils and mashes potatoes, another can be basting the turkey and chopping veggies for other dishes. With two sets of hands, what might be a very chaotic experience can be very enjoyable.

Here’s to you and your first Thanksgiving as newlyweds! Stay tuned to our newlywed blog for Thanksgiving pie recipes and ideas.

Being True to You After I Do: Maintaining Friendships

Friendship is a wonderful thing that can get a person through some of the roughest points he or she faces in life. Friends offer the shoulder to cry on, the tissue to dry the tears, and the invitation to fun activities that promote healing will, undoubtedly, hold great meaning for the rest of that person’s life. Unfortunately, maintaining a new marriage can often strain friendships and challenge them in ways that no one could quite expect. There are many reasons that this happens and it is a natural occurrence. For one thing, marriage changes the way that decisions are made. It is no longer a matter of what ‘I would like to do’ but rather a decision of what ‘we would like to do’. Furthermore, marriage often brings added responsibilities and a new group of people to spend time with. This doesn’t mean that a friendship ends when the words ‘I do’ are said, but that the relationship will require effort.

Scheduling – Time as a newlywed, must be split between the marriage, old friends, new friends, and family. Often the best way to maintain friendships with hurting your marriage is to schedule visits in advance. Whether the activities will be done as couples or just you will be attending, it is important to discuss them with your spouse to prevent calendar conflicts such as you planning to attend a girls’ happy hour on Friday but he promised that you’d both be at his mother’s dinner party. Newlyweds need to realize that there’s more than one person making plans!

Understanding How To Handle Change – As we grow up and get married, life changes happen. Some of those changes in direction will be pre-planned decisions and others might be unexpected. However, all can affect relationships, including those between you and your friends. The choice to start a family, to move, or even to change jobs can have major impact on the time you have available to spend with friends and also how your perspective aligns with theirs’. Being aware that changes will happen can make it easier to address them and even prevent them from causing issues within your friendships.

The Need for Boundaries – Though friendships are undeniably important, when you say your vows, you promise to think of your spouse first. Defining special times, places, and events that should be reserved for just the two of you is a good way to prevent hard feelings and big fights in the future. These boundaries will actually make it easier to maintain the friendship and balance it with the new life you have started with your spouse.
How do you maintain your friendships as a newlywed? Have you instituted a girls night in or Skype chats to stay connected? We’d love to hear your solutions and thoughts in a comment!

Answering the Inevitable When Are You Having Kids?

You’re back from your honeymoon for a few weeks and WHAMMO…someone asks “When are you going to have kids?”. That someone is usually a well meaning family member. Why are parents and family members so hung up on when you’re going to have kids? Shouldn’t they just be excited that you’ve met and married the love of your life?!

Whether you have decided to wait a while, or are choosing not to have children at all, prepare yourself (and your spouse) to field questions on the subject numerous times. Being prepared and united as a couple on the topic of babies can minimize the impact of family questioning on your relationship.

From your parents or your spouse’s, the insinuations about having babies are not something that really want to deal with as a newlywed, but you must also understand the reasons that parents feel so inclined to speak up on the subject. Their curiosity might have more to do with fears of their own mortality than anything else. In many cases, the desire to have grandchildren is linked to the desire to carry on the family name, family ownership of a business, or simply the bloodline.

In other situations, the concerns regarding your decision to wait or to not have children at all can stem from the desire to relive their own parenthood or worries over your fertility as you get older. Many parents look back at their child-rearing years as the best time of their lives. When those children have left the home, it is the hope and anticipation for grand babies that provides them the most joy.

Whether it is for one of these reasons or something else altogether, it is obvious that your family love you and wants you to be happy. So next time they ask about you starting a family, remember that the feelings tied to the questions likely run deep. For that reason, be considerate and assure the person that you understand and appreciate the concern, but also be firm.

The best way to answer the “When are you having kids?” question eloquently is to understand your own reasons for making your decision. Does the decision tie to financial reasoning? Is genetic illness playing a role in the decision? Are you simply tied to a profession that wouldn’t provide enough time to properly care for children? While you may not want to express them all, you will feel much more certain of yourself if you’ve identified your core reasons for waiting or not having children.

Whatever your reasons are, be sure to point out that despite the questions, comments, and concerns voiced by others, the decision is one to be made as a couple and that is exactly how you intend to make it.

Have you been hounded by family about when are you having kids? How have you handled the questions and kept your relationship healthy? We’d love to hear in a comment!

Expert Advice: 7 Tips To Sell Your Wedding Dress

Looking for tips to sell your wedding dress? Now that wedding season is winding down and wedding bills are piling up, we chatted with our friends at Poshmark to get some tips on how to recover some money from your recent wedding.

If you do decide to sell your wedding dress, wedding accessories and wedding décor items online, you can:
• Recover about 50% of the cost of your items
• Clear up space to make room for shared closets
• Love the Earth! Recycling a wedding gown reduces carbon emissions from shipping
• Get karma points by helping another bride save on her wedding

Sounds great, but wondering how to get started?

Here are 7 tips to help you sell your wedding dress:

1. There’s no time like the present!

Post your dress for sale as soon after your wedding as possible. You’re not going to wear it again, so why leave it hanging in your closet? Used dresses continue to hold their resale value for roughly 2 – 3 years after they’re purchased and worn (depending on the style) but generally sell for the most money within the first year when they are most current.

2. Price it Right

Many recently married brides wonder what exactly to sell their dress for. Here’s our recommended pricing guideline:
• 50 – 70% of the original value for a NEW designer gown that’s still in stores
• 50% of original value for a USED designer gown from the last two years
• 30% to 40% of original value for a USED custom-made gown
• Reduce the price further if your dress has not been cleaned, is stained/damaged or is more than two years old

3. Use a Fabulous Photo

Buyers will want to see your dress looking its best, so be sure to use photos that show it off! After all, it could be someone else’s dream wedding dress!
When selling your dress online it’s best to include:
A full length picture of the front & back of your dress (preferably on a person or mannequin)
• A close-up picture of any detailing, beading or embellishments on your dress
• A close-up picture of any damage or stains on the dress (if applicable)
• A picture from the manufacturer
Posting less than stellar photos (i.e. on a hanger, a badly lit photo etc.) or no photo at all, will make it more difficult for the bride-to-be to visualize the dress and could hurt your chances of selling.

4. Be Specific

• Brides will be scanning many listings in their search for a wedding dress, so providing more information will likely sell your dress more quickly
• Be specific about color, brand and model number. Often, brides-to-be will try the dress on in a store before they search online for a budget-friendly version, so the more information you can provide, the better.

5. List any Alterations

It’s important to be up-front about the condition of your dress. Describe any alterations that were made and specify whether or not they’re reversible.
For example, the original dress might have been a size 10, but if it was altered to fit a size 6, buyers need to know. Let brides-to-be know of any damage to the dress such as stains, tears or runs. Be honest and you won’t waste your time or their time.

6. Get Your Dress Cleaned

It’s important to clean your dress right away. A clean dress shows that you have cared for and loved your dress, and helps it present better.

7. Be Prepared to Sell!

Once your dress is posted with great pictures and all the details, ensure both you and your home are ready to show the dress to potential buyers.

3 easy steps to prepare for the sale:
• Make time to meet interested brides-to-be. Try to be available on evenings and weekends if possible.
• Create a place for brides-to-be to try on the dress, preferably a private space with a full length mirror.
• Be ready to negotiate the price and know your limits so you can make decisions on-the-spot.

Have you ever considered selling your dress? What would you do with the money you made back from its sale? Did you pay down wedding debt or purchase something for your new home?