Balance

Looking for name change advice or some tips for newlywed life? The MissNowMrs experts have created state-specific name change articles and checklists for you. We’ve chronicled our recommendations for how to travel while changing your name AND how to handle voting during the transition.

We’ve also compiled our best guidance for how to handle difficult sister in laws, holidays as newlyweds, the ever-annoying baby questions, and much more. Why? Because, while we are name change experts, we’re also newlywed wives, moms, and sisters.

We hope our name change advice articles help smooth your transition to your new name, and a whole new phase of life. Congratulations and best wishes from the entire MissNowMrs team!

5 Signs Your Newlywed Husband is in a Bromance

Is your husband in a bromance? Does he have a guy friend that he is unusually close to? He’s always talking to him or about him and reminiscing about times they’ve had together—if so, it is very likely that you’re man is part of a bromance! Some of you may be thinking, a what?! Urban Dictionary’s definition of a Bromance is a close relationship between two males to such a point where they seem like a couple.

They are more common today than ever before due to the growing number of men (and women) waiting longer to get married—and staying single. Bromances are typically between 2 heterosexual males who have known each other for a long time (since childhood or college) and may even share a bond like brothers often do.

You may recognize some of the following celebrity bromances: Brad Pitt and George Clooney, Ben Affleck and Matt Damon, P. Diddy and Notorious B.I.G. (in the early 90’s). Most guys tend to have at least one best friend or co-worker they really enjoy hanging out with/being around, so there’s no need to get upset or feel jealous. Although, these negative feelings are understandable if your spouse does any of the following:

5 signs your man is part of a bromance:

He talks to his bro more often than he talks to you or anyone else and they have so many inside jokes that to you it sounds like they’re speaking a different language.
He tells you (and anyone else who will listen) the story about that “one time…” over and over again!
He tells you that he’s going to run your thoughts/ideas on a big life decision (i.e. buying a house, changing your career or starting a family) by his friend to see if HE thinks it’s a good idea.
He spends more time/effort making plans for his man date than he does planning a date night for the two of you.
He tries to include his friend in any plans you’ve made including: dinner dates, concerts, cocktail parties, vacations, etc.

If any of the above mentioned signs struck a cord with you, you’re not alone! Hey ladies, you may have a girlfriend, sister or co-worker you enjoy being with too—so try not to judge! However, in all seriousness if your man is focused more on his bromance than on romancing you it could cause some bumps in your marriage.

It is best to sit down with your husband and communicate with him about how you feel in this situation. Allow him to explain to you why his buddy means so much to him (if you don’t already know the reason(s)). After all, it’s sweet that a he feels so strongly about his friendship and shows how loyal and sensitive he can be. Perhaps he just needs to be reminded that the two of you are in a union and need to spend quality time together—alone!

So tell us ladies, has your husband brought his man crush along to your romantic Valentine’s Day dinner date or something worse? Come on, we know you have stories of a Bromance between your spouse and his BFF, so please don’t keep them inside…share them with us and other readers!

3 Things You Can Do to Keep Your Guy Friends and A Happy Wife

Now that you’re married, how do you keep your guy friends? Guys always tend to have a posse of guy friends. After all, they are who you watch your favorite sports games with, sometimes they are who you work with, and overall, they are who you have a good time with. There are some times though, when your wife may not be particularly thrilled with some of your buddies. You may be lucky and everyone gets along beautifully. But then there may be a few moments when you realize things are becoming a bit tense between times when you hang out with the guys and when you are with your wife.

Seeking out the right balance between your friends and your true love can occasionally seem a bit tricky, but try following these three simple concepts:

1. Don’t let the guys talk you into anything you are uncomfortable with (or that you know your wife would seriously object to!).
Many women object to a man’s friends because of the things he does with them. From getting drunk to doing something ridiculous, your wife might worry that they are a bad influence on you. Their potential bad influence as well as your wife’s disapproval can lead to a knot of problems. Any time you go out with your friends, remember that you are an adult and will make adult decisions. Your friends should not be able to talk you into anything that you do not want to do. Likewise, if you know your wife has a serious problem with something in particular, you can make her a much happier woman by agreeing to stop that specific activity and stick to your promise.

2. Make sure to balance out time with the guys and time with her.
It isn’t hard to understand that men will need some time with other men. Just as your wife goes out with her girlfriends for a fun day of shopping or a spa treatment, she understands your need to hang out with the guys and relax. As long as you balance out time with your friends and time with your wife, everyone will be happy. If you spend each and every night with the guys and never spend any alone time with your wife, it won’t be any surprise that you come home to a very unhappy woman! She married you – she loves you, and she wants to be with you. When you show her that you can manage time with her and time with the guys, she will feel comfortable in your commitment to her.

3. Remind her that she is #1 in your heart.
When it comes down to the wire – the guys or your wife – let her know that she is your #1 choice. Sometimes it may be as simple as telling her you love her and you intend to be home by a specific time and then honor that promise. Or it may mean staying home on your anniversary when the guys have prime hockey tickets. Just remember, honoring your new wife will only result in good things for you. Trust us….it’s worth it!

Newlyweds: Finding a Healthy Balance

Are you finding a healthy balance in your marriage? Newlyweds love spending time with each other EVERY chance they get and sometimes they are so caught up in the newlywed bliss that they forget to keep in touch with their friends and family. We’ve all done it a time or two, who could blame us: with work, working out, keeping up with our favorite hobbies and TV shows, not to mention the chores at home and let’s not forget cuddle time!

It’s easy to set your relationships with family members and friendships to the side because you’re so consumed with your new life, but remember the people who love you. Some of them may not understand what’s going on (because they’re still single or they’ve been married for years so the ‘newlywed stage’ has long passed). It’s expected that for a few weeks, maybe even months that you and your spouse will be starting your new life together.

During that time you’ll both be getting used to living together (if you haven’t before), going through the dreaded married name-change process, joining bank accounts, even buying a house and moving—simply put, you’re taking care of your business with the idea in mind that as soon as you’re finished you’ll start keeping in touch and hanging out with friends and family again. By that time you may have already offended your friends and may find that not everyone is okay with picking up where you left off a few months ago. Some may even demand an explanation as to why you’ve been a bad friend!

Here are a few tips on how to juggle your time when your new married life begins (after the Honeymoon) so you can avoid hurting your friends and family.

Call your parents at least once per week. Your parents love you more than anything in the world and just want to know what’s going on in your life (especially after you’ve left the nest, think of your poor Mother)! Even if 10-15 minutes is all the time you can spare, just call them and let them know how everything is going. You can even ask them advice (if you need it) and may learn a thing or two (after all, they’ve been married and could offer you valuable tips on how to navigate through the transition of new married life).

Make time for family. Not all families live in the same town or even the same state anymore, so it’s not always possible to make it to Sunday Dinner with your entire family. If you do live near your parents or in-laws (and come from a close-nit family) they will most-likely expect to see you more often. Try your best to visit them at least once per month (together as a couple)–you could save time by inviting both sets of parents to your place for dinner. They will adore seeing you as a hostess/host of a dinner party and you get to use some of the new kitchenware that you received as wedding gifts! If you live out-of-town try to plan a weekend visit every 2-3 months (or as your schedule permits) to catch up with those you love most!

Don’t forget your friends! They’ve been there for you through every up and down in your life–relationships, drunken nights, arguments with your boyfriend/girlfriend, failed exams, your engagement, graduation, job promotion, wedding planning, etc. Some of them may have even put up with your bridezilla moments, so don’t allow yourself to neglect your friendships! After all, eventually you and your spouse will have your first fight as a married couple…and who will you call if you haven’t kept in touch with friends or family? We get it! You and your spouse are totally in-love and want to be together every second of everyday, but you should make time for yourselves too.

Everyone needs ME time to do whatever makes them happy, so call up your best friend and make plans to go shopping, out to dinner, to the gym, out dancing, or for drinks. Believe me, your man loves spending time with you, but will also appreciate time with his buddies for poker night, happy hour, to play video games, to play golf, etc.

So, bottom line; pick up the phone and make plans with your friends and family to lead a more balanced and healthy married life!