Cohabitation can be full of newlywed surprises and compromises. If you’re moving in together after the Big Day, you probably can’t wait to start married life together. What could be more romantic than sharing a home, waking up together and never having to wait to see each other? With all of this built up anticipation, the challenges of early co-habitation might catch you off guard. There are several things to consider as you plan your move-in to help smooth the transition and ensure newlywed bliss.
If your partner is moving into your house, make room for him. Empty a closet (this can include a painful trip to Goodwill) in your room for his clothes, and if room permits, give him a room that is “his”. These small acts will show your man that you have made room for him in your home and in your life. He will sincerely appreciate the fact that you don’t expect him to squeeze himself and his stuff in a corner. Added bonus: the man room can be a great place to put any of his bachelor “décor.”
If you’re both moving to a new place after the wedding, consider how much space you’ll need based on how much stuff you both have. If neither of you can part with the majority of your furniture, you might need a much larger place than you anticipated. This brings us to potentially one of the harder parts of living together…combining your stuff. Try to be as rational as possible when approaching the big merge. If you have a ratty old couch from college and he has a new sofa, concede that his should be the one you keep (even if it is orange). Make trades, such as “I’ll get rid of this lamp if you get rid of that recliner”.
If you can’t come to a decision you both feel good about, consider donating both items and buying a new one together. It’s important to realize that with the addition of all of your wedding gifts, it is virtually impossible to keep all of each person’s belongings.
Living or moving somewhere with two bathrooms? I highly recommend starting a marriage with your own bathroom. Learning to live with someone can be stressful, and allocating bathrooms allows you to keep your current morning schedule without interrupting each other. It also circumvents any disputes about cabinet space and leaving seat up vs. leaving the seat down. Small amounts of personal space allow you both to breathe and adjust to living together.
No matter where you’re living or moving to, communication and planning are key. Try to hash out the majority of major co-habitation decisions before your move. Take into account both partners’ current schedules, commutes, belongings and ideas as you come up with a mutual plan to co-habitate and start your journey of married life together. A little planning goes a long way towards happily ever after!
Do you have any funny co-habitation newlywed surprises and compromises? We’d love to hear how you accidentally used an expensive bottle of “his” wine to make spaghetti sauce or how he ended up washing his hair with your fancy body lotion!