Newlywed

Looking for name change advice or some tips for newlywed life? The MissNowMrs experts have created state-specific name change articles and checklists for you. We’ve chronicled our recommendations for how to travel while changing your name AND how to handle voting during the transition.

We’ve also compiled our best guidance for how to handle difficult sister in laws, holidays as newlyweds, the ever-annoying baby questions, and much more. Why? Because, while we are name change experts, we’re also newlywed wives, moms, and sisters.

We hope our name change advice articles help smooth your transition to your new name, and a whole new phase of life. Congratulations and best wishes from the entire MissNowMrs team!

Why Man Space Has Nothing to Do with Your Marriage

Have you heard of man space? We all have personal space (and need it) and when someone violates the unspoken rule of ‘not invading someone’s personal space’ we tend to feel strong emotions about it. We expect people to adhere to these unwritten rules because they go along with our perception of protection and safety in our environment, right?

While you and your spouse may not need to follow unspoken rules to feel protected or safe you still expect one another to respect your personal space. Women tend to be the interior decorators in the home and like to have everything just so (matching and coordinating EVERYTHING and worrying about how it all looks), causing some men to long for Man Space.

What is Man Space and why is it necessary, you ask? It’s a place where your man doesn’t need to worry about anyone else’s needs, but his own. He can mix and match old college furniture, his favorite childhood bean bag and have a huge TV with ugly speakers and not have to worry about what you think about it. He can play video games, watch the movies HE wants to watch, not clean-up after himself immediately upon finishing a snack or scratch his butt (if he wants to) without worrying about offending anyone!

Some of the most common places to create Man Space are a garage, a basement, or even a shed in the backyard. Believe it or not some couples are actually basing their home-buying decision on whether or not there’s enough room to create Man Space. They are even making some eye-popping changes to create the ideal man cave such as; sports themed rooms, putting in a bar and pool table as well as in-home theatre and surround-sound systems! So, you’re thinking “how does having Man Space for my husband help me,” right?!

Here are a couple reasons why allocating space specifically for your man is a great idea—for BOTH of you.

Keeps him at home not at the bar: You don’t really want him lounging around at the local bar all the time, do you? He can enjoy himself just as much with a beer in-hand in his new man cave!

Guys night at your house, rather than at that single friend’s house you’re not so sure you trust: Think about it…if your man has his own room where his buddies can come over and enjoy watching sports while downing a few brews they won’t be bugging your husband to go out on the town so often.

No arguments over what to watch on TV or him making a mess of the room you JUST cleaned: Lets face it, you like to watch Oprah, or Lifetime (what my husband refers to as “the man hater channel”) or What Not to Wear and he wants to watch Sports Center, Law & Order and the big game. You see how creating a space just for him will allow for each of you to enjoy some ME time indulging in your favorite guilty pleasures?!

He needs to catch up on work emails and you just want to exercise and listen to music: Cyndi Lauper was onto something with “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.” If your husband has a room where he can handle his business and you can blare music and dance around the house without bothering him, isn’t it worth it?!

When you started reading this post you might have been thinking, “Why do men need a room solely for them?” What are you thinking now? We’d love for you to share your thoughts and stories on Man Space, and why it’s necessary for the both of you, so leave a comment below!

Social Security Name Change: 3 Things the S.S. Office Will NEVER Tell You!

If you’re interested in Social Security name change, you must have decided to change your name in some way after your marriage…so congratulations! The first step on you quest to become a Mrs. is to complete and file your SS-5 Social Security form. Many states require that you file your Social Security form 24 hours before changing your name on your driver’s license, or anything else. Other state offices must see your new married name on your Social Security card before they will file your other name-change forms. It’s very important to understand your state’s policies before you begin filing your forms, or you may end up making a very complicated process (married name-change) even more tedious!

If you’ve dug through your files and safety deposit box and can’t find your Social Security card with your maiden name on it, don’t panic. One of the most common married name change misconceptions is that you will need your old Social Security card to file for you new one. The truth is…you don’t!
You do need to find out your state’s policies on married name change. Some states recognize a woman’s right to change her middle name to her maiden name after marriage, and some do not. Depending on where you live, you may need to alter the married name you’d envisioned using, or contemplate a legal name change instead of a married name change to get the middle and last name combination you want. The Social Security office will allow you to change your middle name to your maiden name on your Social Security card regardless of your state of residency. The result? If you live in a state that does not allow middle name change due to marriage you will have one married name on your Social Security card and a different one on U.S. Passport, state driver’s license, mortgage…ect! The resulting complications and confusion these differences can cause are unbelievable.
Most newlyweds are under the impression that they have to stand in an endless line at the Social Security office to file their name-change form and get their new Social Security card with their new married name. Guess what? You don’t! There is a mail-in filing option available for the SS-5 name change form. This option does involve sending some very important paperwork through the mail, so it is important to fully understand the process before you decide to take this route.

Now that you know the 3 things the Social Security office will never tell you, filing for your social security name change should go smoothly. Have you thought about filing all of your other name change forms?! If the entire married name change process seems overwhelming, again don’t panic! MissNowMrs is a married name change app and service designed to take newlyweds through ALL of the paperwork necessary to go from Miss to Mrs.!

Why spend hours trying to figure out this frustrating process when you could be focusing on the fun of being a newlywed? Let the MissNowMrs name change experts guide you through your married name change in half an hour!

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Honeymoon Stage: Is This For Real?

Are you in the honeymoon stage? One of the most exciting new statements in your vocabulary once you are married is, “This is my husband!” After being married, you’ll hang out with couples (both dating and married) and will most-likely hear a lot of, “Oh, you’re still in the honeymoon stage.” This is one of those statements that you don’t necessarily want to hear because you’re not sure how to take it–and what does that mean anyway?

My husband and I have decided after two years of marriage that there is no such thing, and in fact we have grown closer and are even more in love today, than the day we got married! I continue to ponder the concept and meaning of ‘the honeymoon stage’ and guess people may associate it with characteristics such as: a consistent glow or aura of happiness, PDA’s, or classic gentleman moves like opening doors and pulling out your chair. These characteristics are considered to be quite romantic to most women and we ALL want to feel the utmost love and appreciation in our relationship. It is so exciting to see young, married couples that are truly the best of friends and madly in love. It’s even more endearing when you can find this in a couple that have been married for 15, 25, 35+ years, where this love and friendship has continued to grow stronger with time.

So now when people say to my husband and I “You must still be in the honeymoon stage,” I take this as a compliment, as I am happy to hear that others can visibly see the kind of relationship that my husband and I share– and that is something to truly be proud of and smile about no matter what ‘stage’ we may or may not be in!

No matter what stage you’re in, if you need to change your name MissNowMrs can help. Use our easy name change app or online service to save 13 hours of hassle!

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M.I.L: Friend or Foe?

Is your M.I.L. friend or foe? Some of you may be still getting used to your new title as a “wife”, and of course with this title comes a few additional responsibilities… some of which you may not have thought of pre-wedding!? You’re married now; which means that you now have another family to be a part of and share your life with! I see this as a blessing, but don’t get me wrong there can also come a few obstacles with your new role in your spouse’s family.

First off, the biggest obstacle (or some may refer to as a battle) is establishing a relationship with… (you guessed it!) your M.I.L., also known as your Mother-In-Law. Establishing and developing this relationship can be a breeze for some of you, and conversation and friendship may be of second nature! For others, the relationship can be walking a fine line!

If your spouse has always held a close friendship or bond with his mother, you may find yourself wanting to take over the reins as the new ‘woman’ in his life, however; it is important to know your role and she will learn to know hers as well. You are his wife now, but his mother is… still his mother! That still doesn’t mean that it’s OK for her to call him every day just to “talk”! If your spouse has always been sort-of-a “momma’s boy” placing distance between the two of them is not going to happen overnight, but it will naturally diminish over time.

The key here is, as it is for most things in married life, communication, and equally important, knowing when to bite your tongue! As long as you and your spouse understand each others’ point-of-view (your feelings and your opinions–because you’re entitled to them), and you also make an effort to understand and respect where your MIL is coming from, the roles in this tripod relationship should be comfortable and non-threatening! Take the first step to open up the lines of communication if you are finding yourself in an awkward situation with your MIL, and show her you want to be her friend more than anything- that will work out in your favor in more ways than one!

At the same time, if you are feeling that some boundaries need to be set, talk about this with your spouse so that you don’t hit your boiling point! As much as you are trying to be #1, and be the best wife possible; know that he already sees you that way…and his mother knows this too. There are always going to be disagreements in marriage and throughout life in general, and you won’t always see eye-to-eye, especially with family members! Be confident in who you are, and show your spouse’s family the fabulous woman that you are!

And remember this, kindness and mutual respect will go a long way as you decide to deem your M.I.L. friend or foe!

Newlyweds: Finding a Healthy Balance

Are you finding a healthy balance in your marriage? Newlyweds love spending time with each other EVERY chance they get and sometimes they are so caught up in the newlywed bliss that they forget to keep in touch with their friends and family. We’ve all done it a time or two, who could blame us: with work, working out, keeping up with our favorite hobbies and TV shows, not to mention the chores at home and let’s not forget cuddle time!

It’s easy to set your relationships with family members and friendships to the side because you’re so consumed with your new life, but remember the people who love you. Some of them may not understand what’s going on (because they’re still single or they’ve been married for years so the ‘newlywed stage’ has long passed). It’s expected that for a few weeks, maybe even months that you and your spouse will be starting your new life together.

During that time you’ll both be getting used to living together (if you haven’t before), going through the dreaded married name-change process, joining bank accounts, even buying a house and moving—simply put, you’re taking care of your business with the idea in mind that as soon as you’re finished you’ll start keeping in touch and hanging out with friends and family again. By that time you may have already offended your friends and may find that not everyone is okay with picking up where you left off a few months ago. Some may even demand an explanation as to why you’ve been a bad friend!

Here are a few tips on how to juggle your time when your new married life begins (after the Honeymoon) so you can avoid hurting your friends and family.

Call your parents at least once per week. Your parents love you more than anything in the world and just want to know what’s going on in your life (especially after you’ve left the nest, think of your poor Mother)! Even if 10-15 minutes is all the time you can spare, just call them and let them know how everything is going. You can even ask them advice (if you need it) and may learn a thing or two (after all, they’ve been married and could offer you valuable tips on how to navigate through the transition of new married life).

Make time for family. Not all families live in the same town or even the same state anymore, so it’s not always possible to make it to Sunday Dinner with your entire family. If you do live near your parents or in-laws (and come from a close-nit family) they will most-likely expect to see you more often. Try your best to visit them at least once per month (together as a couple)–you could save time by inviting both sets of parents to your place for dinner. They will adore seeing you as a hostess/host of a dinner party and you get to use some of the new kitchenware that you received as wedding gifts! If you live out-of-town try to plan a weekend visit every 2-3 months (or as your schedule permits) to catch up with those you love most!

Don’t forget your friends! They’ve been there for you through every up and down in your life–relationships, drunken nights, arguments with your boyfriend/girlfriend, failed exams, your engagement, graduation, job promotion, wedding planning, etc. Some of them may have even put up with your bridezilla moments, so don’t allow yourself to neglect your friendships! After all, eventually you and your spouse will have your first fight as a married couple…and who will you call if you haven’t kept in touch with friends or family? We get it! You and your spouse are totally in-love and want to be together every second of everyday, but you should make time for yourselves too.

Everyone needs ME time to do whatever makes them happy, so call up your best friend and make plans to go shopping, out to dinner, to the gym, out dancing, or for drinks. Believe me, your man loves spending time with you, but will also appreciate time with his buddies for poker night, happy hour, to play video games, to play golf, etc.

So, bottom line; pick up the phone and make plans with your friends and family to lead a more balanced and healthy married life!