Relationships Archives

Give We a Rest: A Guide to Maintaining Friendships Post Wedding

Your girlfriends are all happy that you’ve met the love of your life and tied the knot. Most, if not all of them, were there for your big day AND all of the days you spent planning it. Marriage changes a person, and your friends are adjusting to the new newlywed you. No need to make it harder for them.

Remember your single buds and to try not be “the nouveau newlywed.” You know, the girl who coordinates all of her outfits with her spouse, spends all of her time with him and can’t possibly have a conversation without overusing “we”. Examples: “We love that restaurant”, “We plan to move in the next few years”, “We think that you should date so and so.”

Make a point to go to brunch with the girls and listen to what is going on in their lives. Ask about their relationships and jobs. Seems simple, but in the midst of your newlywed bliss it is all too easy to skip out on all-girl outings or blabber entirely too much about how great love and marriage is (trust me they’re happy for you, but enough is enough).

Time spent and conversations had with your girlfriends are priceless. Allotting time and attention to them from the very start of your marriage will ensure that you don’t look around in two years and realize that you lost touch with the people that knew you best before “I do”. You’ll also get to smile and pass on this advice when those friends get married and can’t help the “we” speak!
Have you been caught up in “We-dom” or been guilty of it yourself? We’d love to hear all about it in a comment.

Newlywed New Years Resolutions II

Have you made any newlywed new years resolutions? While there’s great debate about whether anyone keeps the resolutions that they make, just the creation of a resolution can be helpful to a new marriage. If you haven’t made any resolutions with your spouse, here are a few resolutions that may be worth talking about:

1. Use Your Words – This is a cornerstone of my marriage. We promise to use our words to tell each other how we’re feeling and what we need. It keeps little things and annoyances from brewing into big things and arguments. If you and your spouse could use a little more communication, consider resolving to “use your words” in the new year.

2. Make Time – Every newlywed couple I know is juggling careers, families, friends, hobbies and figuring out how married life works. Making time once a week or twice a month to spend an entire day together without family, friends and cell phones will do wonders for your relationship. By scheduling “couple time” your making sure that your marriage remains a priority amongst the million other things clamoring for your attention!

3. Do Something Positive – Whether you join an indoor soccer league or soup kitchen, doing something positive and new in the new year is only going to benefit your marriage. You’ll have new experiences to talk about during dinner (instead of re-hashing work drama) and a new network of friends to explore. There’s also the great feeling of helping others or being part of a team to boost your mood.

If you’re unsure what new thing might work for you, check out www.charitynavigator.org, which helps people find the best charities in their cities.

Resolutions or not, this is going to be a great year for you as a newlywed! Do you have any newlywed new year resolutions that you made with your spouse? I’d love for you to share them in a comment!

If name change was one of your newlywed resolutions, MissNowMrs can help! Use our name change app or online service to save 13 hours of hassle.

Help Me Change My Name

Kahnoodle: A Relationship App for Newlyweds

How do you feel about a relationship app? When you think of all of the time and effort you put into planning your wedding, it is kind of amazing that there isn’t much done to prep you for being a newlywed. Sure, you may have done some pre-marital counseling through your church or synagogue, but whats 3-5 hours versus the 12+ months of wedding planning?

Technology to the rescue! Kahnoodle is a free newlywed app that allows you to communicate what you need from your partner and give him/her kudos for the kind things they do. There’s a calendar feature/reminder that will keep you both from falling into a rut and even a challenge to keep their “love tank” full. I love that this app is fun and functional!

No one wants to sit down and write a list of what the want and with that their spouse would do for them…it’s tedious and can offend the other person. However, communication is key to a happy marriage. Using an app reminder to challenge both sides to step up their relationship game equals a fun way to keep your newlywed love on track.

Have you used Kahnoodle? We’d love to hear how it’s helped your relationship and what your favorite feature is! Also, if you’re into marriage apps, don’t miss the MissNowMrs app. It helps users streamline the 13 hour name change hassle into 13 minutes on their phones!

Help Me Change My Name

Love Is Spoken Here

Love Is Spoken Here. Every newlywed out there should hang this print near the entrance to their home as a reminder of how important love and loving words are. So much time and energy goes into day to day living (hello 60 hour work weeks), that it can be easy to forget the simple things like saying “I love you”.

Even if you don’t decorate your home with this quote, place it towards the front of your brain. The next time you’re crabby it can keep you from lashing out at your spouse and might even motivate you to engage in some random acts of love.

Unplug to Reconnect!

It’s time to unplug to reconnect. Now that you’re settling into the newlywed life, do you ever feel like you don’t have time to talk or connect with your spouse the way you did before you said “I do”? Balancing jobs, a new marriage, family obligations and all the other joys of life can make for a grueling schedule.

My suggestion to you? Take an evening or weekend and unplug so you can reconnect. Turn off your phones & computers and sign off of all your online vices (from Facebook to shopping). Having uninterrupted time together is precious.

So you’re unplugged and staring at each other…now what? Take a walk through your neighborhood or a park and hold hands. You can talk, or not. Just being together is a good thing! Do activities that you love to do, but never have time for. Restaurant hop and have an appetizer at a few places, discover a museum or get a couples massage.

Another option is to tackle a project that has been on your joint to-do list forever. Need to paint the kitchen? Go pick out paint colors and roll up your sleeves. Completing a task together is rewarding and has been shown to strengthen relationship bonds.

As your unplugged time draws to a close, talk about what you liked about uninterrupted time together. Did you both de-stress? Learn something you didn’t know about your spouse? Have mind-blowing sex? You may realize that the time you spent together makes it easier for you to handle your spouse’s or your own work travel. Whatever the positive outcomes were, make plans to unplug on a regular basis!

What do you do to unplug with your spouse? Have you seen it benefit you relationship and marriage? We’d love to hear about it in a comment!