Newlywed Tips Archives

Aug 05 2010

Fido Right After “I Do”?

What are the pros and cons of fido right after I do? As you settle into married life and become truly comfortable with your mate, you may start wondering if you should add to your family. Many newlywed couples run right out after the wedding and get a puppy together. For some it’s the best (well second best) decision they ever made, but for others pet ownership brings more responsibility than they bargained for. Eager to hear the pitter patter of little paws? Read on before making a decision that will affect the next 10-15 years of your life.

How Much Do You Travel?

If you and your partner travel for business constantly or end up spending many weekends away from home, you might want to postpone your trip to the breeder or Humane Society. A puppy of any kind requires scheduled walks, house training and hours off exercise to burn off all of their excess energy. It would be unfair to add a dog to your family if you’re not home enough to give him/her the proper attention. If you can’t wait until your schedules settle down to get a pet, consider a kitten. They’re much lower maintenance and still provide a great deal of love and cuddling.

Consider Your Lifestyle

Are you part of the married jet set? Constantly attending out of town parties and going on last minute vacations? Unless you want to hire a dog sitter and dog walker every time you aren’t going to be home or come home to a unhappy puppy and totally wrecked house, you might need to put purchasing a pooch on hold. If you’re dying to get a dog, try to enjoy other people’s pets in the absence of your own. You could even volunteer at a local shelter, but beware of bringing multiple pets home!

Think About Your Housing

Do you live in an apartment or rental house? Your landlord might not appreciate an unannounced addition to your home. Should you need to find a new place to live, having a dog severely limits your rental housing options. If you live in a small condo, you need to decide if your puppy will have enough room. Even home owners have many questions to answer before bringing home a dog. Will it stay indoors, should the yard be fenced or should a doggie door be invested in?

Select the Right Pet For You

So you read the last three sections and know that you are ready for a dog. Congratulations! Take some time to discuss what you and your partner want in this pet. Do you want a cuddle buddy and he wants a guard for your home? Your perfect dog is out there, so try taking this quiz that matches people with pets based on criteria such as yard size, shedding, exercise habits, etc. Once you know the best type(s) of dog for you two, you can begin the fantastic journey of finding a puppy and making it part of your family.

Pets are such a wonderful part of life, but they are a big responsibility. Did you get a fido right after “I do?” Did you fight over the name or breed of dog? Did he “surprise you” with a puppy for Christmas? We’d love to hear the good, bad and ugly….so leave us a comment!

Jul 29 2010

Newlywed In Bed

Newlywed in bed? Now that you’re sharing a house, life and possibly a last name…you’re also sharing a bed…every night. While there are some definite benefits to sharing a bed with your mate there can also be a few adjustments too. Here are a few common newlywed bed complaints and fixes.

1.Snoring
No matter who in the couple is the culprit, snoring can wreck a good night’s sleep and cause some serious resentment in the morning. Try to figure out what causes the snoring: allergies, dry air or laying on his/her back and then fix the situation. Simply popping a decongestant or buying a humidifier could be your solution or one of you may need to get some ear plugs. If, after trying some of our suggestions, the snoring situation is still leading to sleep deprivation make a doctor’s appointment. There are medical conditions that can cause snoring and you want to make sure your best beloved is diagnosed and treated.

2. Cover Stealing
Anyone who has ever woken up at 3:00am freezing cold and looked over to see their partner cocooned in all of the blankets knows how annoying cover stealing can be. Fortunately, there are a few alternatives to an all night game of cover tug of war. One thing to try is tucking in your side of the sheets and blankets to anchor them in place. You could also consider buying the next size up in linens (ex: buy King size sheets for your Queen size bed) to have more “coverage” available.

3. Miscellaneous Pets
It’s enough to share a bed with your husband, but what about the combination of your pets? One of you may be dead set on letting Fluffy sleep with you, but there are a few things to consider. Does the animal disrupt either partner’s sleep? Is there a possibility that Fido has fleas or ticks that could end up in your bed or on you? Does a pet in the bed decrease your likelihood of getting it on? Here’s an article that covers the pros and cons of sleeping with your pets. At the end of the day, you need to make a decision that results in you being a well-rested and happy couple. If you’re feeling really guilty about giving a pet the boot out of the bedroom, you can always buy them their own fabulous bed!

4. Snooze Addicts
As a single person, it is completely acceptable to hit the snooze button on your alarm several (okay more than several) times each morning. As a newlywed it is insanely rude! Unless your spouse gets up before you or is an absolute saint, you need to find a way to decrease the number of snoozes. Going to bed 15-30 minutes earlier in the evening may make waking up the first time the alarm goes off easier. You could also try positioning your alarm clock across the room so you have to get out of bed to turn it off…thus decreasing the likelihood that you’ll roll over and go back to sleep.

Do you have a newlywed in bed pet peeve or story? We’d love for you to share it with us and our readers!

Jul 14 2010

3 Things You Can Do to Keep Your Guy Friends and A Happy Wife

Now that you’re married, how do you keep your guy friends? Guys always tend to have a posse of guy friends. After all, they are who you watch your favorite sports games with, sometimes they are who you work with, and overall, they are who you have a good time with. There are some times though, when your wife may not be particularly thrilled with some of your buddies. You may be lucky and everyone gets along beautifully. But then there may be a few moments when you realize things are becoming a bit tense between times when you hang out with the guys and when you are with your wife.

Seeking out the right balance between your friends and your true love can occasionally seem a bit tricky, but try following these three simple concepts:

1. Don’t let the guys talk you into anything you are uncomfortable with (or that you know your wife would seriously object to!).
Many women object to a man’s friends because of the things he does with them. From getting drunk to doing something ridiculous, your wife might worry that they are a bad influence on you. Their potential bad influence as well as your wife’s disapproval can lead to a knot of problems. Any time you go out with your friends, remember that you are an adult and will make adult decisions. Your friends should not be able to talk you into anything that you do not want to do. Likewise, if you know your wife has a serious problem with something in particular, you can make her a much happier woman by agreeing to stop that specific activity and stick to your promise.

2. Make sure to balance out time with the guys and time with her.
It isn’t hard to understand that men will need some time with other men. Just as your wife goes out with her girlfriends for a fun day of shopping or a spa treatment, she understands your need to hang out with the guys and relax. As long as you balance out time with your friends and time with your wife, everyone will be happy. If you spend each and every night with the guys and never spend any alone time with your wife, it won’t be any surprise that you come home to a very unhappy woman! She married you – she loves you, and she wants to be with you. When you show her that you can manage time with her and time with the guys, she will feel comfortable in your commitment to her.

3. Remind her that she is #1 in your heart.
When it comes down to the wire – the guys or your wife – let her know that she is your #1 choice. Sometimes it may be as simple as telling her you love her and you intend to be home by a specific time and then honor that promise. Or it may mean staying home on your anniversary when the guys have prime hockey tickets. Just remember, honoring your new wife will only result in good things for you. Trust us….it’s worth it!

Jul 08 2010

5 Newlywed Rules to Throw Out the Window

One of the most annoying things that will happen to you upon becoming a newlywed is receiving unwanted, unsolicited advice from other people (both single and married)! They will bombard you with all of the ‘Newlywed Rules’ and tell you how to live your life the ‘right way’ in order to be happy. My question is: How do they know what makes you and/or your spouse happy? And what’s with the cookie-cutter way of living life, anyway?! Some of the most common rules are as follows along with reasons why you don’t have to follow them:

Rule #1: Spend All Free Time Together
We are hoping that you already realize that this is not possible and could be quite boring! If you DO end up spending ALL your free time together you’re not only going to run out of interesting things to talk about, but you will also lose touch with your family and friends. You may also find yourselves fighting more because you are sick of each other! So, get out once in awhile and enjoy catching up with friends or having time to yourself!

Rule #2: Stop Hanging Out with your Single Friends
Wait, what?! The idea that you and your spouse are a married couple and should work on replacing your single friends with other married couples is just ridiculous. It’s a great idea to have a mix of married and single friends so that when you decide to host a dinner or Super Bowl party there’s more than just one ‘type’ of person in your crowd. It will make for more interesting and dynamic conversation and an overall better time!

Rule #3: You Must go Out on Dates to be Happy
While my husband and I stick to having at least one Date Night per week (we don’t have children yet—and realize that it gets trickier when you add them to the mix), it is not necessary that you and your spouse go OUT on a date each week. Date Night doesn’t always have to mean dinner at your favorite restaurant and a movie at your local theater (that could seriously put a strain on your budget)! Your date could consist of a night at home cuddled up on the couch with your spouse. Do what works for the two of you and don’t worry about what the definition of a date is to other couples.

Rule #4: You should both Share a Last Name/Bank Account/Gym or Country Club Membership/Etc.
Nowadays 86.6% of women change their name in some way due to marriage, but that doesn’t mean that you have to. Many women are opting to have 2 last names (with or without a hyphen) or to replace their middle name with their maiden name. Now men are even changing their last name to their wife’s last name upon marriage and some couples are changing both their last names to a new last name! With all these choices out there, why would you worry about what someone else wants you to do?

It’s okay if you and your spouse decide to keep your own last names or separate bank accounts and just split the bills in half. Believe me, companies are going to accept your payment whether it comes from one check or a combination of two checks—they just want the bill paid on-time! As for your gym membership–if you attend a private Yoga or Pilates class and your spouse has a membership at a different gym, don’t feel obligated to make changes to your fitness routine. Sometimes you can save money by combining your memberships, but if there’s not that big of a difference in price or you’re not worried about losing the money than keep attending your own classes (and consider it ME time)!

Rule #5: Make a 5-Year Plan
If you are the type of person who sets goals and has a better chance of achieving them by writing them down on paper, than do it! Some people tend to stress out if they don’t reach their goals in the time they allotted to do so and end up dwelling on the idea of failure when this happens. If you are more-likely to freak out if you miss a deadline, then making a 5-year plan could be a bad idea for you. You will drive your spouse crazy with your what ifs, should have, could have, would haves! Why not just enjoy the first few years of marriage without having to worry about your deadlines to: buy a house, start a new career, start a family, go on a 2-week European vacation, etc.?

We spend so much time worrying about someone else’s idea and vision of the perfect life that we forget to just LIVE ours! Remember, it doesn’t matter what other people are doing to make their marriages work because they aren’t a part of yours. No two marriages are exactly alike and what works your grandparents, parents, in-laws and friends may not work for you. So, focus on making sure you and your spouse are happy. Keep communicating, laughing, loving, and enjoying your fabulous life together!

We’d love hear what crazy ‘Newlywed Rules’ you’ve heard since your nuptials. Leave us a comment below and start a discussion with other Newlyweds!

Jul 07 2010

Registry Entertaining: What to do with ALL of the new stuff in your kitchen!

Don’t miss our tips for registry entertaining! Newlywed bliss and tons of newlywed gifts…sounds great right? Now that you’re moved in and opened all the wedding gifts, you may be wondering “Why did I ever register for this?”. Most newlywed couples will agree that they might have gotten a tiny bit overzealous with the registry gun and may have even ended up with everything they asked for! Not to worry…we’ve come up with a few tips and ideas on how to utilize all the sparkly new kitchen equipment stuffed in your cabinets.

Blender: So you’re looking at your top-of-the-line blending technology in awe and wonder….and possibly wondering what to make first. While your first inclination might be a margarita, there are so many things you can make instead! Work your inner kitchen diva and whip up a batch of spicy summer gazpacho shooters. Williams-Sonoma has a great recipe that you can use the next time you end up hosting a neighborhood BBQ. You could also use your new blender to jump start a healthy summer diet with fresh fruit protein smoothies in the morning. Missing your girlfriends? Blend up one or more of the facial recipes at Hello Glow and invite them over for a fun face mask and a movie! If that margarita still sounds best…..you could surprise your best friend or hubby with an impromptu fiesta and let go amigo!

Panini Press: These great little machines elevate the sandwich from boring lunch option to savory party fare. Panini parties make for really simple and really fun registry entertaining! Invite a few friends over and lay out several sandwich ingredients for them to choose from. You can pick a theme to make the entire party/meal flow together, such as Italian Summer or All American. With the Italian theme you could serve any of the following: Italian sodas and wine for beverages, chicken, prosciutto, salami, any selection of Italian cheeses, roasted red peppers, fresh basil or fresh sage for sandwiches and then tiramisu for dessert! Worried you don’t know how to use your press? Sounds like a great time to do a test run dinner with your spouse. Have them read the instructions while you assemble two sandwiches. Pop them in the press and watch the clock. You’ll have a mini dinner party for two in minutes!

Wine Decanter: – Not only does this glassware improve the taste and bouquet of red wine, it also looks great as a wine bar or kitchen shelf decoration. Don’t pack your decanter away somewhere. Display it and be inspired to enjoy a nice glass of wine with your mate. Decanters improve even inexpensive bottles of wine, so take twenty minutes and unwind with your spouse tonight after work…just because you can!

Have you done any registry entertaining of your own? We’d love for you to share your tips and ideas in comment below.